As a previous NICU mom whose newborn spent his first six weeks in three different NICU facilities, the last one being where his life threatening medical condition was finally under control, I felt led to share some thoughts on how a Postpartum Doula could positively benefit the newly delivered family with a NICU baby.
We all know how beneficial the services of a postpartum doula can be to a family who has just delivered a baby, but amidst the overwhelming circumstances of having your newborn admitted to a NICU facility your postpartum doula becomes an invaluable asset to your team. And here’s why:
Your postpartum doula can help you navigate the climate of the NICU scene with regard to the medical, emotional, physical, and mental challenges you will be facing. She can encourage and assist you in asking questions, seeking clarification, researching options, and obtain information from the medical personnel caring for your baby.
You will still be in recovery mode requiring as much rest as the situation will allow. Should you feel the need, your postpartum doula can offer you a break from sitting by your baby’s bedside so you can snatch a nap, grab a bite, tend to your family, take a phone call, or just grab a change of scenery. Once our son’s condition had become stable I would have appreciated the opportunity to leave his bedside knowing someone else was with him.
I spent countless hours in what we jokingly referred to as the NICU’s “milking parlor” where I pumped for my son. What a drudgery it soon became having to wash/sterilize my pumping supplies while my baby lay alone in his bed. What a blessing it would have been to fall back on my doula to take care of those details for me while I returned to my baby’s bedside as soon as possible.
The NICU culture comes with its own language, health care providers, protocol, and equipment. We were so overwhelmed with the medical crisis we were in the midst of and keeping up with the various doctors, nurses, surgeons, therapists, and medical personnel involved became unreal, never mind keeping up with the information they were relaying to us. Having an outside party to help keep track of these details would have been tremendously helpful.
Not only are there many different staff members involved with the care of your baby in the NICU but there were multiple services/benefits made available to us. We were blessed with a social worker that made herself available to us and she provided us with gift bags, helpful books, gas cards, meal vouchers, grocery gift cards, coupons, etc. She made sure the hospital’s chaplain came to our bedside once we approved it. Tracking all the services that were accessible to us was a bit tricky and knowing that someone else was keeping up with that information, so that we didn’t lose out on beneficial services, would have been helpful.
There were times during our NICU stay, once the baby was in a stable place, where my husband or I wanted to make an overnight run to our home to be with our other children but that left whoever stayed with the baby alone. A postpartum doula could have been very advantageous to the one who stayed back with the baby to give them a reprieve for meal, potty break, or whatever else might arise.
Since our son was a patient in the NICU he was eligible to receive physical therapy at his bedside by a professional physical therapist. Our other children that were with us at the hospital were also eligible to attend the mini-schools that were set up for patients in the NICU and PICU (Pediatric Intensive Care Unit) and their siblings. However, unless I requested these services once advised of them, they would have gone by the wayside. So asking your doula to remind you of services that were important to you could easily ensure that nothing is getting overlooked as you deal with more important issues.
Perhaps you can fall back on your postpartum doula to make a super market run for healthy snacks/drinks, groceries for the folks on the home front, gathering things for you from your home, picking up mail, or just chauffeuring you around, if you’re not up for driving. Maybe she can set up meals for the family members that are still at home to relieve your mind of one less detail. The same is true for childcare if you have other young children that you need to provide care for.
As our families was inundated with cards, gifts, meals, texts, Facebook messages, and calls, I had the worst time keeping up with sending out Thank You cards or just keeping friends and family members updated on the baby’s condition. I can see how using a postpartum doula to handle this task could relieve you of a bit of pressure.
These are just a few points I thought would be helpful for parents to consider as they prepare for the birth of their baby. Please don’t hesitate to utilize the services of a postpartum doula if you expect a NICU stay for your newborn once he/she is born. You will never regret it. Also, remember that a postpartum doula can be invaluable even if your baby is in good health and you anticipate a normal post delivery season.
